My life as a garden gnome

I think Portland needs a chapter of the Garden Gnome Liberation Front. But I do hope to spend most of the day in the garden. So much to do, so much growing so fast: muy excitamente. It's spring!

Self Portrait Challenge

Who needs take your daughter to work day?...

...when you can take your dog? Wink is working very hard today, as you can tell. Hold all of her calls! Deadline!

Previous post....revealed!

Why is there a cop in my backyard and why is she doing a dog track in my garden? Wait. That's Wink! She's in training! K-9 Unit to the rescue!!!!!

Bwahahhahahaha: this is the full picture, uncropped, from my previous post. AdRi actually gave me the "okay" to post it. It's really quite sweet to see a cop in full uniform, talking sweet baby talk to a little fluffy white dog. I love my AdRi, I love my Winky.

This is what Spring feels like to me

If the sight of the blue skies fills you with joy,
if a blade of grass springing up in the fields has power to move you,
if the simple things of nature have a message that you understand,
rejoice, for your soul is alive…
—Eleonora Duse

When white guys try to rap...

Click here to see the wonder....
Sometimes it really hurts, doesn't it? I'm trying to place a year on this gem...

Cool thing #59 about North Portland: a Tool Library

I live in North Portland for a reason. I like the diversity, I like the unpretentiousness, I like the friendliness of it all minus any posing. And I really like the independent thinking. Take for example, this morning.

We're doing some work around ye olde homestead. Mainly, putting in a mini-fence for the mini-dog. Because AdRi is registered with the local tool library, we don't have to buy or rent any tools. We go to the North Portland Tool Library, and check out what we need. Today it was a post hole digger.

And as we stood in line (oh, it's a very popular place on Saturday mornings), I got to chat up some really great people. One guy was returning a tree pruner, having had to remove several elms at his house that had been hit by the elm beatles. The woman behind me was there to pick up equipment to help her build her chicken coop. Ooh! I love me some chickens! Her A-Frame design would move around her yard, allowing her chickens to cultivate the soil, eat bugs, and provide manure as they went. Ingenius! They have hand tools, construction tools, tools to tile your house, tools for your yard (electric only thank you), and if you live in North Portland, you can register and become a member to check items out. All for free. How cool is this concept?

Once again, North Portland, thank you.

Dear Portland, Turn off your mowers!

My god. My head is throbbing. The incessant whir whir whir buzz buzz of all of the power tools this weekend. Gas powered and loud as hell, they're coming at me from all sides. It's warming up in Portland, and the neighbors are out getting in touch with their manly tools. Mower, edger, blower, power washer. Props for keepin' up the house, really. That's good. But my god! Do they have to make these things so loud and obnoxious?

The Noise Pollution Clearinghouse knows what I'm talking about when I say it's crazy loud.

If everyone in your neighborhood was mowing at the same time with a quiet electric mower, it would probably be quieter than if just one person in your neighborhood was using a typical gas-powered mower.

There's a great link over there to a Washington Post article. Get this:

According to the National Institutes of Health, more than 10 million Americans already suffer permanent noise-induced hearing loss. A typical gas-powered mower offers prolonged exposure to 90 decibels. Sounds in excess of 85 decibels can damage hearing, but noise at only 65 to 75 decibels can cause hypertension, stress, heart damage and depression.

So to all of the lawn jockeys, if you must have pristine, perfectly angled turf, please do us all a favor and go for something quiet like a push mower or electric mowers, edgers and blowers.

Okay, bitch fest over.

P.S. In case anyone wants to tell me to stop complaining, please know I spent all day outside in the glorious day and for one sweet moment this evening I tried to take a nap.

Snakes on a pane!

That's snakes on a window pane...my brother says, "I was sitting here working and I saw something in the window..."
Aah, the joys of Gay Hill, Texas living! Cross your fingers the chickens are okay tonight...

Scenes from a day...

...and proof I'm not in Oregon right now.

She needs her busy bee!!!!

She needs her busy bee!!!!
Originally uploaded by Lelonopo.

If you've seen Best in Show, you know the busy bee. It must be said frantically while clinching your teeth and channeling Parker Posey.

But the busy bee hive and three bees are Wink's newest toy (it was Easter people). The little hive dome holds three separate bees, and she has to work and work and work to get them out. And they squeak, too. She was very intent in getting the job done. As you can tell. Hopefully she'll stop dragging my shoes around the house now. SHE NEEDS THE BUSY BEE! GET HER THE BUSY BEE!

The best Easter house in NoPo

Some people are really into Christmas, some Halloween. Some are into Valentines Day, some the 4th of July. This house is home to folks who really, really love Easter.

We started visiting this house around Easter about 8 or 9 years ago. Driving along Willamette, my eye spied something flashy and I'm sure I made AdRi pull the car around to go back and see what the ruckus was. Blown away by the passion for all things Easter, we go back every year to visit. We've taken guests to the Easter House.

Over the years, different decor has graced the yard, and alas, this year, the big blow-up chick had the wind knocked out of it due to some blustery weather. But you can still take in the chocolate bunny...


the eggs in the tree...


and the very best and my most favorite part, the front bushes turned into Easter baskets. Complete with eggs. LOVE THESE!


Wink very much enjoyed her first trip to the Easter House too...


As did we. I love traditions like this. Have a great week ya'll....

It's been awhile.

Wink time. (must be spoken out loud like Hammer time.)

Marie Osmond is haunting me

I was mortified this morning. There was my childhood doll and character, Holly Hobby, being “re-introduced” and merchandised to the hilt by Marie Osmond. First of all, Marie. Back away from the plastic surgeon. And second, this is Holly-Frickin-Hobby. I loved her! I loved her so much, I had a bonnet. Yes, I had a bonnet in kindergarten. My mom made it for me. It was that swiss dot material: light pink with slightly raised white dots. And a satin ribbon that tied it under my chin.

But back to this morning. Here’s the excerpt and responsible link to The Oregonian:

Holly Hobbie greets a new generation
The gingham-and-calico girl is back with a new style, still full of the love that made great-grandma famous
There is a certain demographic of woman -- mid- to late 30s, first tooth cavity the result of Pop Rocks -- who will soon be able to revel in an odd juxtaposition of pop-culture resurgence.
Brace yourselves, ladies. Marie Osmond is bringing back Holly Hobbie!

For those of us who once played with our Donnie and Marie dolls while lounging on our Holly Hobbie bedspreads, it's a lot to wrap the mind around: One great 1970s icon helping bring another back from the halls of has-been.

Let’s stop for a moment and ponder this. Okay. I obviously fit this “certain demographic of woman.” That’s weird. That never happens to me. Now I did not have a Holly Hobbie bedspread. I had a rainbow one. Alas, I can’t find it anywhere on the web! But it was similar to the rainbow shirts at the time, which were somewhat like this:

Next week, Osmond will appear on QVC shopping channel to sell her interpretation of the beloved American Greetings classic, "Holly Hobbie." The 19-inch porcelain dolls will go for $49.95 each.
How did this happen?
Well, Marie is a little bit country. So is Holly Hobbie.
Seriously, though.
A couple years ago, Osmond said she heard that Cleveland-based American Greetings Corp. was hoping that the gingham-and-calico girl in the blue bonnet it first introduced almost 40 years ago as a character design on a few greeting cards might still have some marketing mileage.
After all, the Care Bears were back with a vengeance. Strawberry Shortcake dolls were once again flying off the shelves. The Smurfs were hot, hot, hot.
As American Greetings worked out marketing deals with Nickelodeon and Mattel to re-release the character in a new, updated form, Osmond sought licensing rights to create a collectible doll based on the classic original.

"I have always loved Holly Hobbie," Osmond said during a recent interview. "So when I heard that American Greetings was bringing her back, I wanted to be a part of it."
Holly Hobbie debuted in 1967 and by the early 1980s was emblazoned on everything from underwear to coffee mugs. The doll was popular around the same time as the Donnie and Marie Osmond dolls -- with their matching purple and pink outfits.

God, I’m going to end the direct quoting here and now. I just can’t take it anymore. My beloved Holly Hobbie is being co-opted by Marie Osmond. Marie Osmond people! She’s a little bit more than country.
I’m now convinced the country is going to hell in a handbasket. And it’s crafted of light pink swiss dot fabric. And I swear, those scrapbookers are behind this…

Peep Post

Ya'll gettin' your peeps on? I'm ashamed to say, I have not bought any Peeps this season...yet. But I am becoming aware of the prevalence of Peeps in schlock culture...and there's lots of stuff out there. Take for example...

Who knew Peeps could be sexy?

Peep jewelry?

Here's a song to get stuck in your head.

Eat a Peep for Jesus, perhaps?

This is disgusting.

Ha ha ha! Peephenge!

Oh, that's good times, peeps. And let's just have the side conversation now: thank god Bucky's gone from American Idol. Now is the real competition!

Remember this next time you fly

Peep Friday

The merchandising of those sugary yellow peeps is really extraordinary. Here's my most recent Peep merchandise purchase. It joins the peep-topped pen (which is also wrapped in fuzzy yellow peep goodness), and my Peep holiday lights. Which, by the way, are now up and draped around the bookcase in my office. They're even sugary, crystally looking. This newest addition is about 4 inches high with wheels on the bottom. You crank it back on the ground, or surface, and off it shoots, peeping all the way. Oh how I love Peeps.

After my earlier post this week which included Peep references, Rozanne shared this website with me: Peep Research. I think it should be called Peep Torture instead. But then I'd be inserting my bias, wouldn't I? Make sure you check out Peep Surgery. Classic!

Have a great weekend, peeps!

This morning's protest on the Morrison Bridge

Traffic seems backed up more than usual. The protestor on the Morrison Bridge has his sign. It's a big one. In fact, it's 8:21am and he's still there: I can see him from here. Holding his sign aloft, cars are unusually quiet. Usually when there's a protest, cars honk in solidarity, or drivers yell profanities. Not this morning. The protest is a little bit different than the norm. The sign the protestor is holding says "Love Yourself".

I love Portland. And I love this protest. A good reminder of something to do a little bit more of today. To be forgiving. To hush the inner self critic. To look at the good I am and do. Despite owning feelings of frustration about too much laundry to do, a cluttered house, a dirty car, a flat tire light that keeps coming on to remind me of the slow leak going on in one of my tires. The task list of carry over items I need to get through at work today. Today I vow to love myself a little bit more. I'd say that's a pretty good protest.

Sugar+Thomas Kinkade+Walking+Hooters+Peeps

With a title like this, could a post really get much better? Haven't done a link-o-rama in awhile, and really, it's starting to get musty in here. Time to air it out! Opening the spring air windows...

This is freaky. Looks like an ad you'd see in the Parade insert in the Sunday newspaper. Followed by a Thomas Kinkade ad.

Speaking of, Thomas Kinkade. Word is he's an ass. Like that's a surprise. Is there anything I dislike more in the world than Thomas Kinkade (insert dynamic whisper voice)—Painter of Light? Let's tack on even more cheese factor with what I saw once in that great 60-minutes expose on the Kinkade phenomonem— he was selling the opportunity to high-wealth clients to come to "his studio" and with the purchase of their kajillion dollar kozy kottage oil painting rip-off, they themselves could paint their own ONE brush stroke of light. Ooh la la. Can you hear the windchimes?

These boots were made for walkin'....here's a walk for you, Brett.

Looks like the new North Portland Hooters is about to open. Cue the drum rolls: I've blogged here about it before.Oh yeah, that's a mightee fine family establishment. Blecht. Let's move on to something I do like...

It's almost Easter. You know what that means don't you? It's time for Peeps. I love Peeps! Clarification: I love the way Peeps look. I don't like eating them. And there's great stuff all over the world wide intraweb for Peeps fun. Take for example, cooking with peeps. Oh, you KNOW I'm going to test drive some of this stuff out this weekend. Especially the delightful sounding Peeps On The Lawn salad!

This has inspired me to post more about Peeps in the coming week...so until then, that's all of the link-o-rama goodness for you. Enjoy the spring, peeps!

There's something in your teeth...

...no, it's there. Right there. Over over THERE. Still there. You got it. Wait. A little bit...GOT IT!

It's Self Portrait Tuesday

P.S. Good lord. I need to get some sun.

When taking lots of photos of your dog pays off

Guess who's a winner? And this time we placed higher than honorable mention. This is the second time I've entered photos for this website monthly contest, and from the looks of it, a lot of people enter. And the photos are really really good. Lucky Wink wins a leather collar and lead: let's hope it's in her size and not the size for a Great Dane.

Speaking of Wink, she had her first outing to the beach this weekend, and I laughed so hard I cried. She ran and ran and ran and was so excited. Funniest. Thing. Ever. She was so into the big open space, the freedom, the water and the wet sand. She's still recovering from it=lots of sleeping going on. And with this time change, I am too. Yawn.